I messaged him and he replied and we talked for a bit. Then he told me he was depressed. He said he lost his sim card so he asked for my number again. He's back in America now. When he called me he told me that he was in love with a girl he used to talk to in VN. I felt the pain throbbing in my heart like a billion knives stabbing me directly at the center. The pain was so unbearable, I cried, but I didn't want him to hear me so I covered my mouth. He kept telling me his problems and how he loves her. It hurts so much but I couldn't see him hurt and feel lonely. I wanted to be there to comfort him and just be there for him because I know how it feels to be hurt and to feel alone. I love him and I don't want to see him that way even though each word kills me 100 times over and over again. I can hear it in his voice..I know he's really sad but I don't know how to help him get through it. He came to a realization and apologized to me about what he's done to me and made me felt before. He said he distanced himself because he didn't want me to fall in love but I already did. He said now he knows what I went through and its all karma coming back to him. I could only tell him it was okay. It's not though because every pain just magnified. He apologized over and over again and he was sorry for telling me of all people about his love situation. He said he only told me because he knew he could talk to me. He knew I'm easy to talk to and that he had some kind of connection with me from the start. I always thought being heartbroken was the worst feeling ever but what's worse is seeing the one you love, love someone else. Every part of me just shattered. Depression has really hit me this time. I can't stop crying. I don't want to push him away. I don't want him to go through this alone. I guess that's what love is. You put the person you love before yourself. But why does it have to hurt so bad? I'm not sure how to help myself. Everything is hurting so bad. What hurts most is that he thinks I'm ok now and that I never fell in love with him.....This is the worst feeling I've ever felt. He said he still wants to be my friend and he still wants me in his life. He wants us to be okay and he'd like to hang out tomorrow since he's in town. I am so so so afraid that I'll break down the second I see him. I know I can't do it. It hurts too much. I won't be able to face him......:'(
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