I just got back from my NY trip yesterday night. It was a great trip and I will remember every moment of it because I spent it with him. We talked out our problems in our hotel while our friend was out with his girlfriend. So, he likes me a lot but he doesn't want to be in a relationship. I know it's weird how we already kissed, held hands, and such but I guess we just don't want to be in a relationship yet, I think. I don't know what's with this guy but I know he's a lot different from guys I used to date. We have so much in common its weird. Sometimes we'll say the same thing at the same time or we'll finish up each other's sentences unintentionally. We share some of the same interests, personas, and much more. I feel like I've known him for so long. He told me about his past and I shared mine as well. I guess we are just trying to get to know each other thoroughly first.
It's a bit weird though because for the past week we've been acting like a couple. We've been going on dates. He took me out to eat Italian food in Little Italy and paid for the dinner. :) In fact, he paid for me a lot while we were in New York. He took me to the movies to watch Ice Age 3. It's a really cute movie and I can't believe he actually wanted to watch it. I told him that I was falling for him already but he told me he doesn't fall in love easily. Something tells me it's because he's afraid to be hurt from love and I respect that because I know how painful it is. I'm usually not the type to sleep with someone until I know for sure how they feel for me but somehow I slept with him. Well actually I know for sure he likes me a lot because his every action and word tells me so. I know I won't regret it because he's a good guy and I know deep in my heart he won't leave me hanging afterwards. Thing is we're not in a relationship and he's the second person I've ever made love with so now what? I'm one of those clingy people after making love because I feel like that's what you do when you're in love. How could it be though because he hasn't love me yet...Am I foolish or just falling head over heels for this guy?! I don't know what to think but one thing I know for sure is I'm falling in love with him. He said I don't know him yet so how can I fall for him so easily. I'd like to ask my heart the same thing but it's telling me that there's something about him that I can trust with all my heart. I told him that love can't be measured with time it's something that comes when it wants and sometimes go as it wants. Plus, I don't care I know I'm falling in love with him and he knows it to. So now the least he could do is open up to me and show me with his heart who he really is. He can give me his I'm not that good of a guy speech all he wants but deep in my heart I can tell he is a good guy.
He's back in Savannah now and I'm missing him like crazy. I'm a little drowsy right now from my cough syrup but I have to vent my feelings. I wonder how we'll be like now that he's back home. I hope he doesn't take everything we've done as a dream because then it'll eventually turn into a very painful nightmare for me. I'm falling for him hard. I can feel it. I feel like I'm missing something when he's not by my side or talking to me. In fact I missed him when he was with me. He asked me how can I miss him if he's there and I told him you miss with your heart not your eyes. ;) Can't wait to hear his voice in the morning. For now sleep would be great.
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