Now that he has his phone back, we've been talking more. We don't text as much as we used to be we do talk on the phone more. I love this feeling he gives me. I love how he makes me smile by the simplest thing he does or say. I love how I get butterflies when I see his name on my phone when he calls. I love how he asks me about my day. I'm really falling now. I can feel it throughout my body. Every part of me is leaning towards him. He makes me laugh when I want to cry. He makes me happy when I'm feeling down. He's not a perfect guy but I'm not asking for perfection. I just want someone considerate, loving, understanding, and sweet. I just want someone who can love me for me and not for the way I look or for my physical assets. I know he's not the shallow type. I love how we think and act so alike. I feel like he's my missing half and I just found him.
So he's been thinking about going back to school next semester. I told him he should and he should go to the same college as me so I can see him everyday. He's still thinking but for now he's prepping for next semester if he does decide to go back to school. I know he's feeling troubled at the moment because he don't know how to answer questions his parents have been probing him. They keep asking him about his future and what will he do? He was going to join National Guard but he doesn't want to anymore. I told him that he should do what he likes and not what his parents like. I mean I'm going to school not because my parents want me to but because I want to for them and their future. I want to be able to support them when they are old and jobless. I want to take care of them and not leave them in nursing homes like many people do to their elders. I know he feels the same way for his parents or he wouldn't have stayed around.
Me and him think so alike sometimes and it's bizarre. Not in a bad way though. I can't stop thinking about him. He's constantly on my mind and every thought of him brings a smile to my face. Oh almost forgot to mention that I had to wake up early today (technically yesterday). I had to take my dad to get a blood infusion because he was low on blood and platelets. When they inserted the needle into his skin he flinched in pain. When I saw him in pain I nearly broke down but I know my parents don't want me to be weak or I feel I shouldn't be weak in front of them. On my way home from the infusion center I broke down in tears. I couldn't bare to see my dad in pain and all I could do was pray for him to get better.
I texted all of my sisters and asked them if they want to have siblings day tomorrow night and they said the weirdest things. My sisters and I have this implied love on each other where we just know we love each other and it's weird to say we do. Also, they make it seem funny to have sisters day. They think it sound a little gay. =P I don't know. Seeing my dad ill makes me want to have more family time and get everyone together. I miss our old family dinners. Now it's everyone for themselves. It doesn't have a family feel in this house anymore. I wish time could be rewinded. So much have changed ever since my dad was diagnosed with lung cancer. We don't know how long he has left but I'm praying for him.
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